My public apology to mixed-race Black folks:
I believe that when someone does/says something wrong publically, they should apologize publically. This is something I have really been wrestling with for a few years, and I realize that I was wrong.
sooo, my public apology:
For a long time, I downplayed the experience of folks that were mixed with Black, self-identifying as mixed or biracial. I even wrote about it.
I realize now that the experience of folks who are post-Loving Supreme Court decision, that are mixed with Black is the result of two consenting adults who are choosing to have children. That is different than most Black folks, like me, who have a lot of White blood because of rape.
It is true that it wouldn’t have mattered how someone self-identified during slavery; one drop of being Black in America makes you Black.
It is also true that too many White Americans, it doesn’t matter if someone self-identifies as bi-racial or not Black; if they have Black blood, they are still a nigger (cue Jay Z’s “story of O.J)
But in 2023, the experience of being bi-racial with Black is different than it has been in most of American history. And, further, this experience is not the same experience of me, and other Black folks who are mixed because of rape, so we/I should invalidate or dismiss the different life experiences of mixed-race Black folks.
So, I apologize to anyone I offended in a discussion, post, or with my writing.
To anyone who wants to see my original piece, it is printed below. I think it is important to keep writings, even if you were wrong. It shows that folks can, and should, be open to change.
Sincerely,
ShaRhonda (Rondi)
THIS IS A POST FOR PEOPLE WHO IDENTIFY AS BLACK OR ARE MIXED WITH BLACK
Okay, I’ve been warned by multiple people, not to write this, because I will be vilified. And, I tried to let it go out of my spirit, but I couldn’t. After a particularly difficult conversation, with people who identify as “bi-racial” or “multi-racial,” where I was told over and over, I was wrong, I really wanted to drop it. I really did!
But the thing is, racism is real, and it can not be eradicated unless we talk about it.
And, part of racism is self-hatred. I love Black people. But we, Black people, have bought into this idea that Black= Bad and White=good. Or Black=ignorant and White=smart. And, that is dangerous! I will never apologize for defending Black people and what I perceive as negative stereotyping of Black people. For sure, racism is real. Racism against Black people is real. So, if a Black person, which is what I call, and the world calls, people who are mixed with Black, says something that is negative about my Black community, I feel it is important to bring it up. However, Black is a huge umbrella term that includes anyone who has Black blood. So, we are all in the same Black community.
James Baldwin says, “IF I LOVE YOU, I HAVE TO MAKE YOU CONSCIOUS OF THE THINGS YOU DON’T SEE.”
I am sure there are minor things that happen specifically to mixed-race folks that they can bond over. That doesn’t mean all mixed-race people are a new race. Mixed-race, is not a racial identity. There is not shared culture. I am currently trying to change the designation on school forms, that currently allows students to identify as “mixed-race” or “multi-racial” a category. Why? Because it is harmful to Black students. Black students, regardless of their mixed heritage are experiencing racism and inequality at schools. So, having Black students, identify as “mixed-race” instead of Black, dilutes the data. We can not track racism adequately, if we have Black students, identifying with students who are Asian and White! There is a difference between someone who is Japanese and German, than someone who is Japanese and Black, especially when that Black comes from the enslavement of Europeans. (#teamNaomi)
Similarly, there is no real shared culture with Latino, Asian, and even Arab, it is only used as an umbrella term to gain political power as a group, in America. So, no, you can’t equate racial experiences with the other experiences, you described.
Honestly, I want all Black people to know and love themselves. We are so broken and have so much to do to relate better with one another.
Here is a brief, and sadly incomplete list of all of our self-hatred issues:
- Black men against Black women
- Black educated against Black uneducated
- Black militants against Black pacifists
- Black Christians against Black, well, every other religion but Christian.
- Black African Immigrants African Americans
- Dominican Republic Blacks against Haitian Blacks
- `Latino Blacks against non-Latino Blacks
- Rich Blacks against Poor Blacks
- Light skinned Blacks against Blacks
- Chicago Blacks against Detroit Blacks.
- Southside Blacks against Westside Blacks
- City Blacks against Suburban Blacks
Literally, this list could go on forever. There are so many ways that Black people hate other Black people.
The generational trauma, due to racism and slavery, is real and different. I work to help Black children and Black people get liberated from oppression. And, that includes Black people who have been oppressed by other Black people. Or Black women who have been oppressed by Black men. But we are still BLACK! I guess, my final comment is if you don’t want to be Black, or don’t like being called Black, or you dislike your personal Blackness, cool. There are lots of people like you. But it is not something that should be encouraged. What should be encouraged is Black people figuring out how we can get along better with each other and fix our community. So, best of luck to whoever wants to identify as bi-racial, and not Black. In the spirit of James Baldwin’s quote on love, and I love all Black people, I’ll say, be careful.
White racism is real. White people are racist. America is racist. So, best of luck, identifying as non-Black, but bi-racial, equally Black and White. Hopefully, you can be one of the first minorities to avoid racism. But, lucky for you, if and/or when, you experience White racism, the Black community, included, will be here to support you. Even if you don’t want to claim us now, and instead believed there is a post-racial America that doesn’t consider anyone 1% Black, a nigger when racism comes to you, Black people will have your back. Ask OJ and Tiger Woods.
Black people, we have to love each other! We have to do better! We have to heal from the legacy of slavery. I love you, Black women, that’s why I won’t let this go. No, you can’t write off your blackness, in favor, of bi-racial.
You are Black.
You can have White relatives, White partners, and White friends, but you are still Black. Further, your White partners, White relatives, or White friends are not, exempt, from being racist and participating in White Supremacy, just because they are with you and/or birthed you. You, Black person, will still receive racism and oppression.
No, you are not the same as other mixed-race people of non-Black heritage. No matter how light or dark you are, we are still Black! Let’s love who we are and stop the spread of self-hatred.
Racism is deeper than self- and individual experiences. And, all us, need to go deeper, to heal.